Pimpin' the Print

Everybody is always saying how slanted and selective the news media is in their presentation of what is covered and how it is covered.

My favorite beef with them is how they cover literature. In the first place, they never cover the release of fiction, unless your name is JK Rowling. Even Danielle Steel, the "Novelist of Light", who sells more books than Jesus, can't get 2 minutes on Nightwatch at 3 AM. The most commonly covered authors on talk shows are, surprise, talk show hosts. Every six months or so Tim Russert, Chris Matthews, or one of the other vanilla flavored talking heads makes the rounds of all their buddies shows, pimping their new little $29.95 volume of wisdom. Do we really need another installment on how "Big Russ" managed to win World War II, hold down two jobs and still find time to spend several hours a day swilling down suds in the family garage. At least, since they are no longer gainfully employed, we won't have to hear about Don Imus' latest coffee table tome or any more of Tom Brokaws heartwarming tales of growing up retarded in Montana.

Then there are the vanity books, collections of anecdotal wisdom, completely fabricated, written by ghost writers, for people who while they may possess rudimentary literacy skills, are no more capable of writing coherent prose than a hydrophoby raccoon. In recent weeks we have been enthralled by the Mother Teresa-like work that Jena Bush has been doing in the slums of South America, pu-leeese. Then there is the little volume of homespun, hometown wit and wisdom by Lynn Cheney. In reality, she kicked the dust of Wyoming off her heels 40 years ago, splits a carton of Kents with Laura Bush every day, downs a half liter of Stoly, dresses designer and never looks back, in fondness or anything else.

Doris Lessing is 87 years old. She won the Nobel prize for Literature this morning. She has been pumping out controversial, cutting edge, contemporary fiction of the highest literary standard for half a century. I've never seen her wares displayed on the cathode alter once. I've never seen a review of her work in print. I doubt I ever will.