"LSD is Groovy. Kill the Pigs!"-Jeffrey McDonald

There is one thing that the fundo-fuckfaced, Bible thumping, neo-night riders want more than anything else from the American Left, violence. As the factional separation of our political system becomes more pronounced, they become increasingly desperate for it. They went to Washington when Cindy and her Ladies in Pink marched, to try and provoke a scuffle, no matter how minor. When no incidents occurred, they claimed to have been spat upon. In truth, many of the poor dears lisp, especially when excited and if you get too close, you do so at your own peril. They talk of being menaced by large groups of bikers on the streets of San Francisco and Minneapolis. It turns out they weren't the fearsome Vroom-Vroom Harley types but the ones powered by Campaignolo and Shimano, with their little plastic teardrop helmets and Lycra tights with padded crotches. It's hard for them to kick ass, when their feet are bolted to the pedals. Har-Har-Har! They desperately hope unsavory ruffians will disrupt the Republican National Convention next summer but so far, no such luck seems to be in store.

There is little politically motivated violence in this country. The occasional openly gay college student will get beaten half to death and then hung up on a barbed wire fence to freeze. The odd Black or Hispanic or Indian boy will be tied to the back of a pickup truck and dragged along the two lane blacktop for a few miles. Every once in a while a Planned Parenthood clinic will be bombed, or one of its physicians will get their head blown off by a high powered rifle from a few hundred yards away. These are just isolated incidents though. They are not sanctioned by any legitimate Right Wing organization. Really, just ask them. They'll tell you so.

Last year there was a soldier, in uniform, who claimed he was picked up on a road in rural Washington State, by "hippies" and roughed up. I looked for some follow up in the local news for several weeks and never found a single word. I suspect it was a hoax, rapidly hushed up by the soldier's command.

Last week there was a great story, all over the media. Some little Princeton boy, who belonged to a chastity society, wrote a story for the school paper, against the school policy of giving out condoms, free of charge, to the student body. Hey, I can get behind that. Any kid who can afford the Ivy League, should be able to buy their own rubbers. Anyway, after the publication of his story, he claimed to have gotten death threats. Then, he turned up at the Campus Police, claiming to have been beaten up by two young men in dark watch caps and overcoats. Presumably these two young men were fellow students, who felt threatened that their supply of free condoms would be cut off. This story was all over Fox News, talk radio and the blogosphere. I haven't seen Brit Hume so outraged since the title General Betrayus was coined.

It turned out this was just a sad, lonely boy with sexual, religious and political identity problems who made the whole thing up. I feel sorry for this kid. I hope he gets some help and they don't kick him out of school or worse, throw him in jail. I wonder if the local gun shops have been given this kid's name and photo. Hmmm.

Don't despair fundo-faggots, there may be some deranged hippies out there, willing to do some violence on you, yet. Bide your time. Keep your hopes up.