Sunday, September 16, 2007

Adventures in Global Warming

For the first time in recorded history, the northwest passage between the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans is open and navigable. It won't be open all year, at least not for now but there should be at least 3-4 good months from late summer into the fall from now on. In another 10-15 years it may be open most of the time.

This means that container ships from China can sail directly to the East Coast of the US and into the Midwest via the St Lawrence Seaway to unload shit loads of cheap Chinese crap that the households of America so depend upon. This will relieve congestion in the West Coast ports and save on secondary and tertiary transportation, warehousing, and distribution costs that dilute the cheap, chewy goodness of Asian products. It means that Asian immigrants, by the countless containerful can now directly access the job markets of the East Coast and Midwest. It also means that the Panamanians can concentrate on their primary mission in life of making sure America gets plentiful supplies of the narcotics that we so vitally need at a price we can afford.

Cruise Ships will now have an exciting new destination to offer. Legions of retirees and swinging singles will soon be partying through the passage, dining on all you can eat buffet and watching the polar bears frolic on the sea ice before they are lost forever in the pages of history. Innuit villages will become colorful ports of call and the money it brings in will quickly quench their ardor for long kayaking trips in search of blubber.

Just when you think life can't get any better in the good old USA, something like this happens and globally warms the cockles of my heart.

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