Friday, August 22, 2008

Rematch!

The fundo fascist, Fox News Network can't let go of the fact that several of the Chinese Olympic contestants are almost certainly underage. You really can't argue with them. Some of the contestants were clearly closer to twelve than the mandated sixteen year old requirement. TV ratings for this Olympics are certainly going to get a bump from the pedo viewership. Some of the events, gymnastics and diving for sure, one should be careful about recording or storing on a hard drive, for fear of the authorities getting ahold of them and bringing charges.

I think, instead of seeking to disqualify the offending participants, we repeat the Beijing Olympics again next year. They've already built all the facilities necessary, so it wouldn't cost much. Maybe next time, they could convince people to come. We will still let them use the little kids. We will not stoop to the exploitation of innocent children. Instead we will scour our sporting community for the most androgen amped, pituitarily enhanced, methamphetamine fueled, transgendered behemoths we can find and pack our teams full of them. Blood testing will be dispensed with for these, second games. Women's beach volleyball will become a full contact sport.

I predict the medal count will be satisfyingly different.

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