Monday, April 19, 2010

A Truly Horrifying Prospect.

I have recently come to a personal peace with religion. I can't even remember a time when I harbored any serious religious beliefs. Because of that I have always wondered if I suffered from some serious deficit in lieu of the fact that so many others, many of whom seem thoughtful and intelligent did.

I think that most people don't believe. They either pretend to, for some kind of personal benefit or are so desperate to believe that they lie to themselves. In any case I believe that religion is all based on lies, from top to bottom.

So, here is what may well be my last blog post about religion. No great loss. My religious posts have never been wildly popular anyway. You may just want to quit reading now, because this is pretty terrible.

One of the most popular and well publicized religious tenants of recent times is that God rewards faithful warriors of Islam with a large number of virgins when they arrive in Paradise after dying in the cause of the Faith. I can never remember how many but it is an ample number although who can say what an ample number is, given the length of eternity.

Where does God get all these virgins? I mean really, how many people, male or female could possibly have ever made it to Heaven while still in the virginal state? I'm not saying that virgins wouldn't make it to Heaven. I'm sure they could, maybe even most of them but really how many could there be. Based on my knowledge and experience, past a certain age, there just aren't that many virgins. Even if a person is more than normally repellent to prospective sexual partners and doesn't hardly ever get laid, that doesn't make them a virgin.

Then it dawned on me. What about all the preborn souls of the millions of aborted fetuses that we have been churning out? They would certainly go a long way to solving God's virgin shortage. Could this be part of God's great plan?

What do it all mean, Mr Natural?

I warned you not to read this.

1 comment:

Cut and Shoot said...

God and Allah are not the same. If God sent his only son to redeem the world why would he later send Mohammed to stir up shit?

I believe the number of virgins given to Islamic martyrs is 72. Female bombers get 72 Chippendales.

Old joke back when I was growing up...What is the definition of a virgin? An ugly sixth grader with braces in California.