Wednesday, June 02, 2010

Happy Daze Is Here Again

Ted Haggard, the founder, pastor and proprietor of one of the most successful fundamentalist, evangelical, Christian mega churches in America, until it was revealed in 2006, that he had for years been procuring sex and methamphetamine from a Gay prostitute, held a press conference in his old stomping ground, Colorado Springs, today. He announced he is starting a new church there, which he plans will be pretty much like his old one.

Normally, you wouldn't expect this to be the smartest business plan for someone like him to come forward with but you have to take into consideration that we're talking about fundamentalist Christians here. In that type of community, pretty much anything goes.

Even if he's not as wildly successful with the concept as he was the first time around, he may find enough donating followers to keep him in butt sluts and crank. They may not even mind his transgressions much, as long as he shares the gory details with them come Sunday mornings, is suitably repentful and similarly tolerant of their own minor dalliances with the Prince of Lies.

I'm more of a Unitarian, myself. We're not hypocritical about that kind of stuff. We bake the meth right into the communion wafers and after we pass that around and wash it down with LSD laced Kool-aid, we have the Gay sex right there on the alter.

2 comments:

Contrary said...

Christians have worked themselves into a corner. "Hate the sin but love the sinner" is a great statement but sooner or later the sinner's are running the church.

The Catholic Church is the premier example. Homos and pedophiles are sprouting up like weeds.

What to do? We have all become Hamlets.

Steve Harkonnen said...

Yet homosexuality is all a matter of choice.

And, to think they'll grant perverts a month - while veterans only get a day.

What are we celebrating? A faggot's lifestyle? WHY????